Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Speak Up... Or Else.

  I wanted to say something. Anything. I wanted to leave my thoughts on yet another reason why this country is headed towards "Idiocracy." I had it planned out perfectly. I wanted to say "how disgusted I am at this situation. This is not a story of a troubled person. This is a story of an altruistic person who is spread way too thin and needs to be helped, not punished." I had spent fifteen minutes staring at the post coming up with a whole beautiful, well thought out rant just waiting to be typed out. I was going to conclude it with "the judge who made this ruling needs to be reprimanded for stupidity. This lack of common sense is why we're headed towards 'Idiocracy.'" (You can venture a guess on the issue if you are caught up on current events). However, I hesitated.

"That's crap," I thought. "Nobody will even notice that, let alone like it." I didn't post anything at all. Again.

  This is just another one of those times where my voice goes unused. It happens all the time. More often than I'd like to allow or admit. I don't like starting debates with people because I fear they will become more heated than I plan. Or I might sound unintelligent. Or I might sound very intelligent but someone will insult me anyway. I try to brush it off like being controversial is not really my style and that I don't really care. But I do care.
  It's never been difficult for me to be intelligent from an artistic standpoint. There's so much leeway to think and analyze with an artistic piece, it's almost like you can't really be wrong. Politics and law are a completely different story. There are so many biases that you really have no idea what's right and what's wrong until you get the facts. Did I mention that because of all the biases and noise the hard facts are always the most difficult to obtain?
  I really don't get why it's such an issue. There are far dumber people out there who can't keep their mouths shut and just babble forever without a single inkling of what they're even saying. So many times have I wanted to retort back at them and make them eat their words and think twice about opening their mouth again. So many. I think that's one of the downsides of having become so introverted in the last year. I think and think and think, but I won't speak unless it's important (Or I'm at work. My job involves a lot of talking.). I think too much and speak too little. Actually I've always thought too much. I've always been introverted as well (technically I'm an ambivert because I switch back and forth), but due to my involvement in performing arts I always assumed that that made me an extrovert. But I digress.
  I have an idea. Not just for myself, but for other ambiverts/introverts in the same boat (and extroverts too, although I can't see how you would even have this problem). Let's make a five-month-late-not-so-new-year New Years resolution to speak up. To voice our opinions without fear of sounding stupid. To take risks and openly run with our ideas. To not be so inhibited.

Time to step into my running shoes.


  1. In the words of RuPaul "What other people think of me is none of my damned business." I think it can be extended to this situation as well. The fewer people who are willing to speak up (about ANYTHING) the more likely we as a people will end up "headed towards 'Idiocracy.'" So let your bitch flag fly and say what ya want to say, hun, damn the people who don't want to hear it or don't like what it is you gotta say. =)

  2. As a fellow ambient performer, I definitely feel the frustration. Keeping quiet on some topics becomes such a strong habit too, because it often feels like speaking up means throwing a giant firebomb into the room and watching things explode. It's one of those ongoing self-improvement projects, learning to speak up fearlessly. :)

  3. You are growing up so fast. If I had had you when I was younger, you would have been an obnoxious extrovert like I was. But you came in my 26th year and I was tempering by then. I think you might be tempering too or at least thinking before you speak.
    Nothing to worry about dear, you will find your voice. You are being quiet while you find it in your latest form of maturity.
    Remember, still waters run deep. You don't need everyone to know your opinion to be able to do great things with it.